Monday 25 January 2016

A new adventure to happiness.

Hello hello, everyone. I hope it's not too late for me to wish everyone a Happy New Year, right? Well, Happy New Year to whoever's out there! Before I start writing any further, I would like to wish you all a wonderful year ahead. I know I'm a wee bit too late, considering it's almost February but we're only one month in and it's never too late to wish something good to other people. I also hope that any one of you who had a terrible year before, have the courage to leave it all behind and start something that makes you genuinely happy. I desperately wish for anyone of those who was hurt by someone or something in 2015 forgive what it was that hurt you and forget about it. Keep moving forward, because time is ticking and life doesn't stop, nor does it wait for anyone. I watched a movie called 'The Curious Case of Benjamin Buttons' and there's this one particular quote in the movie which really helps me to move forward, whenever I feel like this is the end of it for me. "For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again." I really hope that whoever feels like that it's the end for them, it really isn't. You have a choice. You always have a choice.

So, I'd like to write about a person, who I feel like has made an impact in my life like no one else. Don't get me wrong, this is not one of my cliche 'love story' again. Have you heard of the saying, "some people come into your life for a reason, others for a season"? Well, to me this particular person is both. I'd like to think so anyway. I wouldn't say that 2015 was the worst year for me, but there were a few times I felt like I wanted it to be over so badly and this is where this person came in because out of nowhere, he appeared in my life and though momentarily, he reminded me of what it feels like to be worthy of something. It's a little sad that he's gone but I'm pretty sure there are souls out there similar to mine who needs his aid more than I do and maybe that's why he left. His purpose was met and so he left my life, to go on and remind others that they too, are worth something. I do miss our late night conversations though, they always make me feel at peace. I feel serene whenever I talk to him. I don't know if anyone else has ever felt this way about another soul, but the moment we knew each other I felt somehow connected to him in ways I can't express. To me, he was like a character from a book. Too good to be true. He was unreal, and in the best possible way.

Out of everyone I've ever known in my 19 years of living, no one has ever made me feel as connected with someone than he did. It's like reading a book and finding yourself completely dumbfounded by the protagonist because you wish for a character as such to exist in the real world? As silly and cheesy as this sounds, that's how I felt about him. He reminded me of Alex, a character from one of my favourite books called Delirium. So full of love, dreams and hopes; yet full of mysteries. I miss our late night conversations because I'd like to think that's where his true self appeared; when he was most vulnerable and honest. I could be wrong, but that's just how I feel. He could've meant otherwise but I'd like to believe he was sincere with every word he's ever uttered to me. It was the things that he said to me, which makes me feel extremely grateful to be, well me - plain, old, boring Haziqah. I really would like to share a few of the things that he told me but I think it's better if I keep it to myself, like our own little secret.

I do apologize if I sound like I've fallen completely in love with this person but truth is, I'm not. I don't have that sort of feeling towards him at all. I just feel like it's wonderful to have come across someone who was in sync with me; someone who reminded me of myself. I'm not sure if he still reads my blog but if he stumbles upon it, I'd like to say,

Hey. I hope you'll have an amazing year this year and I hope that all the choices that you make in this life makes you happy, the same way you make the people around you happy. I hope that life is good to you, and I hope that whatever happens in this life you'll never lose that faith; the faith that you said I had in me. I hope God is always with you and helps you, and I really wish too, that the person who makes you happy right now can and will always kiss your pain away because you deserve nothing but happiness.

I guess that's it. Till my next post, x. 
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