Reality, Fate & Destiny- Part 37

#37

His eyes were filled with tears that are just waiting to drop. He looked at me with those beautiful brown eyes coldly and I can feel in the atmosphere that I really fucked it up between me and him. I studied his face as tears begin to ran down, and I felt in my heart that I wanted to make it all better again. I begin to stutter, but I didn't know what to say. My mind went blank, my mouth were opened but no letters nor words seem to came out. I tried to avoid eye contact with him but it wasn't possible because I hurt the boy that I love. Right there at the moment, I knew it in my gut, my heart that I love him.

"Adam, I'm so sorry. Hayden told me that you were seeing Sierra and I didn't know what came over me. He leaned forward, I didn't know why I kissed him," I began explaining to him.

"Seeing Sierra?" he asked.

"Yeah and I- I thought that you were cheating on me."

"So you didn't trust me?" he said and this time, he sounded more disappointed and hurt.

"No! I- I don't know, I was stupid. I'm so sorry!" I half yelled as tears started to gather in my eye. I had always hated that I was too emotional and I cry easily.

"You should go," he wipe his tears and sighed deeply. I spoke his name but he cut me mid-sentence, "just go."

I licked my lips and nodded. I needed time to be alone and I knew that he needed time to think as well. Right when I walked out of the house, I knew that I made the biggest mistake of my life. I knew that I had betrayed someone I love and I could never forgive myself. I knew that it was over between me and Adam.

I didn't want to go home, and I sure didn't want to head over to Mandy's because she would ask me questions that I don't have the answers to so I just sauntered mindlessly and end up at the park where it was nice, warm and quiet. I went over to the swings and swayed slowly, reminisced about me and Adam. I remembered when we played on the swings and lay on the green grass. I sobbed softly, covering my face.

"Idiot," a voice called out. I wipe my tears and look beside me. The same blonde headed guy who showed up at my house rudely sat on the swing next to mine.

"What?" I sniffed and struggle to look at his face.

"I said, you're an idiot. You fucked something up and you think crying is going to make it all better. Fix it instead of doing nothing," he said arrogantly.

"You didn't know what happened so shut the fuck up," I said and pushed my hair clear out of my eyes.

"I don't need to know what happened. All I know is that you fucked something up and you don't think you can fix it because you think it's too late," he replied in a matter of fact voice.

I breathe slowly and bit my lip waiting for him to continue. He didn't even give me any eye contact and after five minutes of silence, I knew that it was my turn to say something.

"Why do you care? Bastard, who do you think you are?"

"I don't care but I have to," he replied. I raised my eyebrows and felt anxious. I gathered the courage to ask him why,

"What'd you mean?"

"You heard me. God I swear, why did I ever make that promise?" he half stated half asked. I became more curious and before I could ask him anything else, he said, "fuck it. You need to stop being such a whiny brat and fix your shit. Jesus."

"You didn't fucking know what happened! Don't talk as if you know me!" I got up and scream. I stood there in front of him and he swayed slowly. The summer wind blew and I could feel the breeze stirred my hair. "Talk to me goddamn it!" I yelled and stop him from swaying.

He stopped using his feet and stare at me. His blonde hair glistered in the sun and he stood up. Our face were just inches apart and I felt scared and mad at the same time. He smirked and for a second there I really felt like spitting on his face.

*************

"Mandy, your boyfriend, or whoever he is, he's an idiot!" I marched in Mandy's house as soon as she opened the door.

"What?" she chuckled and close the door calmly, "Whats up with you?"

"Max is an idiot! Goddamn it Mandy, out of all the guys and you chose him?!" I yelled pacing back and forth.

"Like you're any better," she said sounding serious all of a sudden.

"What- what do you mean?" I stop pacing and look at her.

She scratch her head and rolled her eyes, "Seriously, you trusted Hayden more than Adam?"

My jaw dropped, "how'd you know? Who told you?"

"Who do you think? Jesus Christ Jade, you really fucked it up and sadly I can't help you on this one," she sighed.

"A-Adam told you?" I stuttered.

She scoffed and sat down, putting her legs on the coffee table, folded her arms against her chest and looked at me. She shook her head in dissapointment and sighed deeply. "Fix this Jade, he loves you and God knows how much he's hurting right now."

"How?" I sobbed and sat next to her, covering my face. I was alone in this, and I had to make it right. She shrugged and pat my back, slowly kissing my head.

"I don't know kiddo, but fix it."