Loneliness. - Part 2

"I knew it was too good to be true," I mumbled to myself softly as I swayed on the swing slowly. I look at little children laughing and playing joyfully. I smiled at their reaction and sighed heavily. I sometimes wish that I could travel back into time and be a child again. My expectations has been made: I would never have friends. God, I wonder if they're still sucking each other's face right on my porch. I shuddered and I hoped that Freddie would come here and find me. I like imagining things that would never happen. I like living in my own world, it's nice there.

Here's how it goes in my head: Freddie comes to the park, exhausted after he ran so fast looking for me and when he found me, he spread his arms wide and run towards me with his gorgeous lopsided smile. He hugs me and kiss me passionately and until he ran out of breath. He would hold my hand and give me piggy back rides. Then he would climb up my window and sneak into bed with me.

But of course, nothing ever happens the way I imagine. A little kid ran over to the empty swing next to me and struggles to get on it. He looked at me with puppy dog eyes and pout. This kid was cute I thought. I got up and walked three steps towards him when he started to run away. My heart broke a little when he ran away to his mom. I thought he needed my help but I was wrong; even kids don't like me.

I went home. I needed to get out of this town and move someplace where nobody can find me. Maybe when I'm gone they'll notice me. I hope Annie and Bob's home already. My stomach was starving. Food comes first no matter how shit my life is. When I reached my house, I reminisced about what happened half an hour ago. I shuddered again and sighed. Just as I took a step on the baby step, someone tapped on my back. I jumped into my ninja-mode again and it was the girl who kissed Freddie on my porch.

She was wearing a pink miniskirt, tight blue tank top that made her breasts look bigger than they already are and stilettos. She stood in front of me with pink lipstick and shiny brown hair, her breasts pushed forward, pouty lips and hand on her waist. "I shouldn't even be worrying about you, I bet you don't even go to our school," she scoffed arrogantly.

"Huh?"

"I thought anyone who lives next door is pretty sexy but you look like a loser!" She said and then walked away. I was confused by the situation man and I blinked my eyes slowly thinking that would help me understand what just happened. I sighed and my stomach was grumbling. Whatever I mouthed and went inside.

"Annie! Dad! Are you guys home?" I yelled and threw the keys on the coffee table. I peeked into the kitchen and no one was there. I ran upstairs and no one was home except for me. I groaned frustratedly as my stomach growl louder. I stumble upon the kitchen and made some scramble eggs. This was not enough for me so I decided to call Pizza Hut. Just as I was waiting for my delicious pizza to arrive, Annie came home. Great, now I have to share my pizza with her.

"Jenny sweetie, come gimme a hand with these groceries will ya?" she smiled and hand me a paper bag filled with vegetables and fruits. I took the rest of the paper bag and put it on the kitchen table. Minutes passed and the pizza man arrived. Annie paid for the pizza but she demanded that we share. As much as I love her for paying it, I don't like sharing my food with people.

Hours went by without me noticing and I went upstairs thinking that I have to start the same routine all over again tomorrow. The day was getting darker now, I went to my room, changed into my pink bunny pajamas and climb out the window. I like sitting on the roof and watch the sunset. The horizon calms me and makes me think that life is worth living eventhough I'm starting to doubt my life is worth living or not.

I looked at the empty house next door. I remembered what happened earlier when Freddie caught me in my own world. I've been embarrassed a lot but that moment has got to be the most embarrassing moment in my life. I watch as the beautiful sun set and the smiled to myself thinking about how beautiful nature is. I wish I was as beautiful as the sunset, I wish I was beautiful at all.

I woke up to the sound of my alarm and groaned lazily. I begged Annie and Bob if I could stay home for the rest of the day but they denied my request. They said that no matter how bad it is, education is important. I was against this, of course but I had no other choice. I went to the torturing academical building which people call 'school'. The first bell rang and I had English so I went to my English class and sat at the end of the room. No one was seating next to me, no one even knew I exist. The whole class was talking amongst themselves when the teacher turned his head back to the blackboard. No one was paying attention to poor old Mr Lewkins. I pity the man, he always try so hard to get people to like his class but no one did.

When everyone was busy talking and not paying attention, Freddie stood there by the door, inhaling each little oxygen he can take.

"S-s-sorry I'm late Mr Lewkins. Jesus! I'm tired," he said trying to gain his strength again.

"Oh-oh that's alright, come on in, God Freddie why did you run?" he ask for a reason why he was late.

"I- I had to um.. um.. I had to- er," he was trying to find a lie so that the teacher would believe him.

"Oh, you know what, it's- it's fine. Just go ahead and sit," Mr Lewkins said. Freddie greeted his friends with a high-five and a pound-fist. I looked at him, every curve of his face and his beautiful blue aqua blue eyes shimmer in the light. He smiled at everyone and then to my surprise, he said hi to me and sat on the empty chair next to me. I swallowed hard and sat up straight and out of habit, I bit my lip.

He grinned, "Is this seat taken?" I shook my head and I actually wanted him to sit there.

While Mr Lewkins was babbling about our homework, I was too busy staring at Freddie's face and everytime he caught me staring at him, he laughed. The bell rang, today was going pretty quick I thought. I closed my book, packed my stuff and quickly exit from the class when Freddie yelled my name and asked me to wait for him. Was I dreaming again? Is this some sort of a dream that I didn't want to wake up to? "Jenny! Hey, wait up!" he made my name sounded perfect.

"Since when have you been in my class?" he asked.

"Since third grade," I replied softly.

"Really? How come I've never noticed you before?" he asked while we were walking down the hallway. After a few minutes without me replying he asked, "what's your next lesson?"

"Science."

"Great! Me too, well no actually, I have art but to heck with it. I don't know how to draw, how bout I come Science with you?" he said. What just happened? Did Freddie Johnson just asked to cut his class just so he could go to my Science class? I stopped walking and stood there, looking at him with my eyes wide open and mouth slightly dropped. "Can I then?" he asked again. I didn't know what was happening but I sure didn't want to question it so I nodded in agreement. "Cool well, c'mon then," he winked at me.