Loneliness. - Part 8

Freddie's POV:

"Say something," I pleaded her and attempt to smile. I chuckled nervously and my palms were sweating. I held her hands tighter and gaze into those beautiful grassy green eyes. She's the most beautiful girl I have ever seen and I know this was wrong of me to do so but I couldn't help but fall in love with her. I wish I knew what was going through her mind because usually, I can read a girl's mind ever yet so simple but her, she's different. I can't read her mind, no matter how hard I try. She's got the most beautiful eyes, the cutest innocent face and the purest heart. I try not to fall for her but she's just so different and I have never felt about a girl this way before, not even for Tara.

I think I only went out with Tara because she was the hottest girl in school and people think that we were a great couple. She was good but only for lust and not love. There's just something different about Jenny, something that I can't describe. Her grasp tighten and my heart melt when she smiled. Oh dear God, she's got the most beautiful smile. Then, she got off the bed and knelt in front of me and our bodies were just inches apart. God knows how stunning she looked eventhough she wasn't wearing any make up or anything like shorts or skirts or tank top. Maybe that's why I like her, she doesn't dress to impress.

"Don't you have a girlfriend?" she asked. Jenny's trying so hard to remind me that I have a girlfriend and that this was wrong or maybe she doesn't like me in that way. I sighed and sat down, legs crossed and faked a smile. She sat down opposite of me and I could see every inch of her face. She flutter her eyelashes without even trying to look cute but she was, she is. I took my eyes away from her before I fall even harder for this girl. I barely even know her but the impact that she has on me is just indescribable. I was captivated by her.

I hope she likes me, I mean I want her to like me. "I do but," I replied softly. I felt guilt in my stomach; not for Tara but for Jenny. I felt guilty because I knew I shouldn't have told her that I was falling for her eventhough I was. "I'm sorry," I breathe those two words which brings pain to my heart. She looked even hurt when I told her so and I just wish she would say something now.

****

He really likes me. I can't believe that he actually really likes me. I was so happy I just wanted to lean in and kiss him but I knew I can't. I wish I knew what he's thinking about, I wish I knew what's going through in his head. But then, an idea crossed my mind: why would he like me? I'm not pretty, nor sexy, nor smart (well, I kind of am but it's a figure of speech.) nor perfect. I was far from everything mentioned before so why does he like me when his girlfriend is perfect? "I.." I said and rummage through my head to put out the words into sentences.

"You?" he asked.

"This is wrong for me to do so but I'm falling for you too," I admitted and for once I was relieved. I have never been so relieve before and when I finally got to say what I wanted to say, I felt relieved. His face lighten up and he sighed in relieved as well. I was actually quite surprised me he pulled me into a hug. It felt nice and warm and cozy. It's almost as if I belonged there right in his arms. I hugged him back and we were like little children making peace after an argument over a toy. "I feel bad," I said honestly and I did want him to know that I did felt bad.

"Me too," he whispered and gently let me go. I wanted the hug to last as long as it could but I knew we had to talk this whole thing out. "Tara won't be back until Monday and I don't want to cheat on her but I really want to be with you," he said and smiled, taking me by the hand. I smiled back and him and we just stare at each other for about five minutes. I would never ever get tired of looking at him and I hope he feels the same way.

****

Freddie's POV:

Gosh, I hope she knows how beautiful she looks. No words can describe how happy I felt when she told me that she likes me in that way. I was so scared that she wouldn't like me and that I would get my heartbroken. We sat there holding hands, looking at each other for about five to six minutes and it was the most precious minutes of my life. I just couldn't let go of her hands and I could feel both of our hands were sweating. I didn't want to think anything else except maybe for her and us. I mean, I hope there will be an 'us' because for the first time, I really like a girl.

She bit her lip and started giggling when I push a block of hair clear out of her eyes and place it behind her ears. I just can't find the right words to describe how pretty she was. I am really in love with Jenny, and it hurts so much because I don't want her to be called or labelled as a 'man-stealer' because I know what Tara would do if I told her that it would be over between us. She's like the queen of gossip and everyone in school listens to her and trust her eventhough some of the stuff she says is absolute bullshit.

I just wanted to lean in and kiss her. Just kiss her and hold her in my arms and never let go. I wanted to do that so bad because usually I would do it to any other girls but not to her because like I said, she's different. It's like when you listen to a song that has the most meaningful lyrics and you think about something so beautiful its almost impossible to find any words to describe it; it was like that with Jenny. I just hope she knows that I'm sincere about this and I'm sincere about how I feel towards her.

The day was getting darker and I forgot that I had to be home by six o'clock sharp or dad would be pissed at me but I literally don't care about what's going to happen to me; I wanted to stay with her. "Shouldn't you be getting home? It's getting darker," she spoke so softly my heart melt with every word she says. I giggled and shook my head. I grinned and stood up, taking her by the hand.

"Can I stay overnight?" I asked. I have never asked a girl if I can stay overnight at their house before but I eavesdropped on her and her dad's conversation and he said that I could stay at their guest room. She looked unsure but I persuaded her and told her that my dad won't mind at all because afterall, me and her are going to be neighbour.

"I don't have anything for you to wear," she said sounded guilty.

"It's okay, I can borrow your panties and bras," I joked and she laughed. That made me happy, making her laugh. She told me that she might lend me some of Bob's clothes so I don't have to worry about a thing. That day was the most amazing and precious day of my life. I wanted to tell her this but I hope she already knows it.

****

Wow, I can't believe he asked if he could stay overnight. Luckily Bob and Annie won't really mind if he stayed because he will be our next door neighbour anyway. He joked about borrowing my bras and panties and I laughed. How can someone be so cute, and good-looking and funny all at the same time? I just hope this won't cause any future trouble for both of us because I finally found something worth living for: Freddie. Bob made extra sloppy Joes and he told me that he would be coming home late so if I get hungry again, which I did, I should just eat the sloppy Joes.

We both ate more sloppy Joes and watch TV together. I didn't stay too close to him though because we agreed until he breaks up with Tara, we shouldn't be having any 'physical contact.' I was fine with it because frankly I was too happy to care about anything. I thought him the song, 'Blackbird' by The Beatles on the guitar and he enjoyed it. I was glad that he did because luckily we both liked the same type of music. He gave me inspiration for my lyrics and we laughed throughout the night. It was midnight when Bob and Annie finally came home and they saw us both still in the living room playing the guitars laughing.

Both Annie and Bob were looking quite surprised but not that surprise and they chuckled. "I'm tired, so I'm gon hit the sack," Bob said and kissed Annie. She kissed him back and I hugged them both. My folks both went upstairs to sleep and we stayed up until one or two in the morning sharing music together and just talk. I was so happy I admitted to him that I liked him and I was even happier when he admitted he likes me.