Loneliness. - Part 20

It's been about a whole week now. Me and Freddie haven't really talk much after the whole thing that happened between him and Tara. He explained the whole thing to me of course but I told him I needed some time to think. I didn't know what to think about because to be honest, I wasn't mad at him anymore. His words played through my mind over and over again like a broken record player: "I was looking for something that I wanted to give you but Tara sneaked behind me and she kissed me and I didn't mean to kiss her back. I'm sorry Jen, I love you and only you."

"Annie and I are going to the Brown's family for a dinner in Indiana. You wanna come with us sweetheart?" Bob snapped me back from Jenny World to reality. I shook my head effortlessly and sank down the sofa with my iPod and a book called 'Wuthering Heights' by Emily Bronte. They knew what happened between me and Freddie and they knew me too well not to ask or say anything when I'm sad. So they didn't. "Alright well, there's about 50 bucks in the drawer and if you're hungry or anything, just order a pizza or something alright. We're gonna be home late," Annie said sounding so concerned about me and frankly, they sounded more upset than I was.

"Thanks," I breathe. Wow, I sounded so dramatic. I should be in a movie casting a really depressing role. They strolled out the door leaving me all by myself in the living room. It was only 6:30 p.m so I didn't feel hungry, yet. I scanned through the page that I was reading and I didn't really feel like reading so I went upstairs to my room.

I haven't open the curtains for a week just because I didn't want to see or be reminded that Freddie lives next door to me and that his room was just next to my window. I don't know why I was still upset about this when I'm not. I wish I could forget this whole thing and put it behind me. But that's the thing, this whole situation has never happened to me before. I never thought I'd be in this position. Whatever 'this' was anyway. "This is ridiculous Jenny. You're being stupid. The boy's not gonna wait for you forever, just man up and talk to him again." I had a conversation with myself feeling really angry towards the fact that I was being such a baby about this.

With all the confidence I had, I ran downstairs and just as I was about to open the door, someone knocked. I hesitated but opened the door because I was about to do it anyway. This tall, baby faced, brunette haired guy appeared in front of me with his soft aqua blue eyes gazing deeply into my eyes. I was drowning in his eyes and the curve of his lips looked as if he wanted to say something but he was unsure of what to say. I could hear him breathing anxiously like how I always do whenever he was around. The silence has been going on for about five whole minutes now I think I should at least invite him in. "Fredd-" / "Jen-" we both said each other's name simultaneously. Looking at each other's face, we both burst out into laughter like nothing ever happened.

"Come-" / "Can I-?" we did it again and we laughed again. "Come in," I said finally. He walked in and scanned my house as if he's never been inside it before. "I- I was about to go and see you," I admitted as I closed the door. He turned around and smiled.

"I- I miss you," he stuttered. I nodded my head and said the same thing under my breath. I don't think he heard it. "You do?" he asked. Damn it, he heard it. I nodded with my head down. I could feel him walking towards me and butterflies fluttered around in my stomach when he took my hand and placed it on his chest. "Can you feel it?" he asked as if he was out of breath. I bit my lip and nodded shyly. "It beats only for you." He said bashfully ambled closer until our bodies were only inches apart. I tilted my head and found myself lost again in his eyes.

Slowly, Freddie moved his face closer to mine and grab me by my waist gently. He smiled that glorious smile of his which always seem to melt me everytime and our lips crashed. I kissed him back passionately and remembered how much I have missed kissing him. We swayed around kissing each other and attempt to get on the stairs without leaving each other's lips. It was getting pretty intense and when we reach up the stairs, the worst imaginable thing possible happened: I farted so loud that it was more powerful than lightning.

He stopped and stared at me in amazed, ready to burst into laughter. And he did; he laughed so hard until his eyes were watery and I was more than embarrassed. "Jenny! Didn't know you could do that!" he yelled pinching his nose and waving the other one in front of him. I covered my face in embarrassment and ran into my room and locked the door. I could still hear the echoes of his laughter outside the room. I know I should be mad at him for laughing at me but that would the stupidest thing to do since I farted.

It's about two minutes now and Freddie was still gasping for air after laughing so much and I could hear faint knock on the door. "Piss off!" I yelled almost bursting into laughter myself.

"I'm sorry. I'll stop laughing," he sniggered and inhaled a long deep breath until he released it and started laughing again.

"Shut up!" I laughed and punched the door still too embarrassed to face him. I couldn't hear any laughing or gasping for air outside so I suspected that he was too tired to laugh, still so cautiously, I opened the door and peeked my head out looking for him. "Freddie?" I yelled out because I couldn't find him anywhere.

"Boo!" he popped out of nowhere in front of me. I screamed of course and hit him continuously. "Hey, hey," he said and grabbed hold of my arm gently and pulled me closer for a kiss. I was scared that the same thing might happen again. He raised one eyebrow and sneered.

"Why are you giving me that look? Shut up and let me go now." I demanded him.

"Did you just use imperative at me Miss Gassy," he joked and I rolled my eyes, "and I won't let you go. Never. Not even if you fart again," Freddie sniggered. I rolled my eyes again and draw out a smile at him. He did that thing with his eyes when boys usually do to make girls melt and I got out of his grasp. "I'm hungry. Do you wanna eat? How does pizza sound like? Oh, does it make you gassy?" he joked again and it was getting pretty annoying.

"Ha. Ha," I laughed sarcastically. "Yeah, pizza sounds good and no it doesn't make me gassy." I said sheepishly. He smiled and put his arms around me and kissed my forehead. He took out his phone and dialled the number for Pizza Hut and ordered a large Hawaiian Chicken with cheesy crust, a bottle of coke, 10 chicken wings with extra cheese on top. After he got off the phone with the person, I said, "It's like you read my mind."

Whilst waiting for the pizza, he asked me to go to his house until the pizza arrives because he said he wanted to show me something. I agreed and we made our way briefly to his house. Lucas wasn't home because according to Freddie, he's at work even though it's Saturday. "Sit here," he pat the seat next to him and place his fingers on the white keys on the piano. "I wanna show you how to play the piano." He said calmly.

He played the first couple of notes from the popular piece, Fur Elise by Beethoven slowly. "I know this song," I said proudly. He chuckled and nodded, taking my hand and place it on the piano. He repeated the same notes and I copied him badly. I pressed the wrong notes and he giggled holding my petite fingers whilst pressing on the key. "Oh thanks," I said and attempted to do it again perfectly this time and I did. I could feel him staring at me with love and admiration. I stop pressing the keys and glanced over to him.

"And there you have it," he said with such gentle voice.

"That's cos you're a great teacher," I complimented him. He half smiled and got up from the stool and held out his hand. I looked at him puzzled for a nanosecond and then I remembered that we ordered pizza using my house address. I took his hand and link my fingers with his. It felt right; my fingers fitted perfectly with his.

The pizza man rang the doorbell and I paid him with the $50 that Bob had left me. By now it's only 8 p.m and we both had dinner in the living room. I was careful not to spill any drinks or make any mess because I know Annie would get angry if I leave the house messy. I practically just spend the whole night with Freddie and I forgot everything that happened before.

There's one thing I learned is that no matter how angry you are at the person you love, you would always be able to forgive them and forget what they did even though it caused so much pain to you in the past. Freddie and I stayed in my room until Bob and Annie came back which was around two in the morning and they thought I had already fallen asleep. Freddie hid under my bed just until Annie stop checking up on me and went over to her own bed to sleep. We slept together that night in the most innocent phrase.